REMEMBERING MY "OTHER MOTHER"

MY OTHER MOTHER

I’ve written about my mother in the past, but have not specifically written about my Susie’s mother, Joan Sabina (Adams) Cunningham.  So, today, to mark her birthday, I’ll give you a little information about this very special woman in our lives.

AN ABANDONED CHILD

Joan Adams was born in Worthing, England on July 25, 1919. When her mother abandoned the family her father, traveling vaudevillian, Billy Adams, placed Joan and her brother, Ivor, in the care of the Actors Orphanage, then located in Langley.  At the time the president of that organization was legendary British actor Noel Coward.  She completed her studies until she turned 16, after which she departed and stayed with her paternal grandfather in Bath and began a career as a hairdresser.

BATH, AND DAVE

She met David Cunningham, an adventurous soul, in Bath and they became soulmates.  Sponsored by his uncle Lawrie Cunningham, a haberdasher in Oakland, CA., Dave matriculated to the United States in 1937, leaving his sweetheart at home in England.  After being an “illegal immigrant” for a couple years, he received permission to remain in the country and work.  He wrote to Joan regularly, regaling her with his adventures and begging her to join him.

IMMIGRATION

Finally, as many young people were being evacuated due to the commencement of World War II, she left England for the United States.  She traveled, as an attractive 21 year-old, via ship to the United States, all the while enjoying the attention of RAF flyers aboard traveling to learn to fly US warplanes.  She arrived in New York in November, 1940 and traveled by train to Southern California where she and Dave were married on December 7, 1940 - exactly one year before the United States joined the war.  Dave attempted to return to his native Britain to serve in the armed forces, but was rebuffed.  He joined the United States Army and briefly served in Southern California.

WHITTIER AND BEYOND

Dave and Joan first lived in Whittier, California before moving to Newport Beach in 1953, where they raised 4 children - James, Susan, Lawrence and Robert.  He was a very successful businessman, holding leadership positions in several horticultural organizations and managing a wholesale nursery.  Eventually he created his own business, D.L. Cunningham, Inc. - purveyors of top quality trees and shrubs for developers throughout the state for more than a half-century.  Although no family members remain involved, the business continues to carry on the tradition of being the gold standard for product and service today.

JOAN WAS THE ANCHOR

While Dave was building the business Joan was busy managing their household and raising 4 great kids.  She was also active in local community organizations like the Daugthers of the British Empire, Brownies, Girl Scouts, Ticktockers and National Charity League.  Both were avid tennis players and played active roles in the Adoption Guild.

CLASS PERSONIFIED

Joan was the epitome of a genteel, cultured British woman.  She was a loving, supportive wife and mother, an enthusiastic friend and volunteer and an energetic, gracious hostess.  Each of her children have her easy smile and quick humor, and learned proper decorum by her example.

TRAVEL, TRAVEL AND MORE TRAVEL

Dave and Joan were frequent travelers, usually venturing far and wide with nursery business associates.  Dave retired after bringing children Susan, Lawrie and Rob into the business.  With more leisure time their travels became more frequent and extensive.  After every trip to some exotic place they would return and exclaim that they had still not found any place better than their home.

AFTER DAVE’S PASSING

Dave passed away in 1991 and Joan continued to be the strong, loving matriarch of the Clan Cunningham until her passing on July 12, 2003.

“THE BOOK” A LEGACY

Following her passing Susie found a box which contained the small diary her father kept during his emigration to the United States plus nearly 200 letters he had written to Joan during that time, telling her of his adventures and begging her to join him.  Susie decided to transcribe them for the family.  That project evolved into a 112 page hardbound book, with every word of her father’s thoughts transcribed verbatim and included family images plus period-appropriate photos.  Each child and grandchild has a copy of that book.

HAPPY MARRIAGES AND MANY KIDS

Each of their sons found wonderful mates and each pair had three terrific kids and many of those have also had kids.  The Clan Cunningham now numbers four children (including their eldest son, Jim, who passed away in 2021), nine grandchildren and 14 great grandchildren - and counting.

REMEMBERING JOAN

Every day I see pieces of Joan in Susie’s expressions and actions.  We both see her mother when we’re around her brothers and their children.  She has left a legacy of  intelligence, civility and humor that permeates the family.  She is dearly missed.